Statistics show that between 65 – 70 percent of divorce actions are initiated by the woman. Though every situation is unique, the reasons that men typically try to hold on even when it’s apparent that the marriage is beyond salvation are fear of losing their relationship with their children and fear of the financial cost of divorce. There are tons of advice books, websites and counseling groups that help with the family side of divorce, but financial advice and court orders are often either wrong-headed, vindictive or just plain unfair.
A New Perspective on Money and Divorce
Some of this advice is counter to the norm, but there are benefits that you may not see while you’re in the process. The goal is to be fair to your ex and to your children, but save a little justice for yourself as well. A divorce doesn’t need to put anyone in the poorhouse.
1. The home. Traditionally, the wife remains in the home. This is due to the fact that the wife is usually awarded custody of the childen, and it’s easier if they’re not uprooted from their surroundings. However, until the divorce is final and property arrangements are settled, you are not legally obligated to move.
2. Child support. Child support is supposed to be determined by the man’s income and the needs of the children. if you’re concerned that your support payments are going to finance your ex’s wardrobe and not the children’s basic needs, arrange to pay as many expenses directly as possible. This includes things like school tuition and supplies, extra-curricular activities and medical expenses.
3. Spousal support. This is an area that really fires up some people’s emotions, but there are benefits to you if you pay a fair amount of alimony, especially if your ex-wife earns considerably less money than you or if she gave up her career for some portion of the marriage to stay at home and raise the kids. Refusing to pay spousal support because you can’t stomach the idea of cutting her a check every month is only forcing your children into a lower standard of living as well. Unlike child support payments, alimony is tax deductible; just make sure you keep the two payments separate. Keep in mind that if your wife makes more money, and you were the stay at home parent, you are entitled to support.
Cordell & Cordell is an example of a law firm that tries to fill a niche in legal representation. Law firms that specialize in a specific area become experts in the subject and can better offer their clients personalized service. In this day and age, when everyone feels like a number, it’s refreshing to have personal support and guidance.